Anti-Valentine's Day LA Parties for the Desperate, Lovelorn, and Horny
True story: Once upon a time Hallmark created Valentine's Day so they could sell more cards. Then people started hating Valentine's Day, so card companies turned around and started selling millions of Anti-Valentine's Day cards. This worked because corporations are very smart and people are very stupid. In response to a whole day created to remind them of their personal failures, they purchase moronic cards and t-shirts with cartoon rabbits who brag about bitch-slapping Cupid. Pathetic. You want to know how handle Valentine's Day if you're single? Here's how. You mope your way into a bar and get blisteringly drunk. Then you squint through the haze, stumble into someone suitably desperate, and go home for an evening of debauchery followed by a morning of self-loathing. That's how you do Valentine's Day if you're single. Here's a list of LA bars and clubs that throw Anti-Valentine's Day Parties -- places brimming with exactly the kind of despair you'll be looking for. And needing.
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Upright Citizens Brigade Valentine's Day Edition
5919 Franklin Ave
Los Angeles, CA 90028
[link]
Mystery Bus Tour Anti-Valentine's Day
1745 N Vermont Ave
Los Angeles, CA 90027
[link]
Mountain Bar Lock & Key Party
475 Gin Ling Way
Los Angeles, CA 90012
[link]
Little Rock Anti-Valentine's Day Party
5507 Reseda Blvd
Tarzana, CA 91356
[link]
Boulevard Lounge Singles Awareness Day
1114 N Crescent Heights Blvd
Los Angeles, CA 90046
The politically correct name for Anti-Valentine's Day -- apparently necessary because being "anti" anything unbalances the auras of our latte-drinking, yoga-attending … masses -- is Singles Awareness Day (SAD). WeHo's ever so chichi Boulevard Lounge is holding an event in honor of this wonderful day, urging you to celebrate and embrace your inner single by showing up for half-priced cocktails and burgers. You only get the deal if you show up alone. If you show up with a date, on the other hand, the other customers are allowed to kill you and eat you. This is a fact. [link]
Birds Anti-Valentine's Day Party
5925 Franklin Ave
Los Angeles, CA 90028
[link]
