Walking the Tourist Walk in London
I'd always been under the impression that most people don't want to "do" the tourist thing in a city. Don't most travelers surreptitiously hide their map inside a newspaper, avoid tourist hot spots, and generally try to look cool and blend in with the locals? I wondered who would be the kind of person that went on an open top bus, a Duck Tour or one of those guided walking tours. But I've recently discovered that people I know - English people who've known London all their lives - have been sneakily going on London Walking Tours. It turns out that someone I know also voluntarily sat on a bright yellow amphibious vehicle for fours hours. Perhaps the best way to avoid being spotted doing something so touristy is to don a good disguise, such as making sure your party all have matching pac-a-macs and hats a la the Griswald family in European Vacation. Fake beards and sunglasses would also work. Then you're free to snap photos of Big Ben, point open-mouthed at monuments and listen to your guide inform you of all the things you (and I, a born and bred Londoner) didn't know about London.
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London Walking Tours is the original and most reputable of the walking tour companies. They run lots of tours every day of the year which always begin and end at a tube stop. The Jack the Ripper tour is frequently (but not always, so check) guided by Donald Rumbelow, "the internationally recognized leading authority on Jack the Ripper." The walk begins at Tower Hill tube stop at 7.30pm every night and at 3pm on Saturdays. The cost of all the walks is £6 for about two hours and you don't need to book, just turn up and make sure you've latched onto the official tour, not an impostor (yes, there are those). After touring the gruesome 19th century murder trail they advise a drink in The Ten Bells in Commercial Street, now a haunt of hipsters but also, I just discovered, the pub where it's said Jack the Ripper met some of his victims. At the end your guide will drop you off safely at the nearest tube stop. There are over 100 walks, many with a disturbing or sinister theme. There's a ghost walk, a tour of subterranean London and one called Westminster at War which ends inside the Cabinet War Rooms, the fortified bunker that was Winston Churchill's center of operations during WWII.
The Duck Tour is a familiar sight to Londoners. The name comes from the amphibious crafts on which the tours are conducted, which were originally used for the D-Day landings. They are now painted a yellow that is certainly...eye-catching and are used to shepherd tourists around the main landmarks of central London. This is accompanied by a guided commentary. The Duckmobile then launches into the river Thames at Vauxhall and goes past the Houses of Parliament. It costs £19 and must be booked well in advance. The potential embarrassment if someone you know spots you on one of these is extremely high and should only be attempted by those willing to fully embrace their inner tourist.
