All stories about "Zach Everson"

A few weeks ago I was raving to my father-in-law about Rustico, a neighborhood restaurant in Alexandria, VA, just outside of DC. Between its 331 types of beer and new American cuisine, I figured it'd be a great place to take him on his next visit. But when I said that my favorite meal there was macaroni and cheese, he laughed. "You go to a restaurant for macaroni and cheese? How much is it?" "$16," I whimpered and his laughter intensified. You know, maybe I am a fool. But damn it, ex-editor Chris's write up of New York's best restaurants for mac and cheese was one of the most read posts of 2007 on Gridskipper. So I can't be the only idiot. Maybe as current editor John said, "All these urban sophisticates are just softies once you crack the surface." Regardless, whether you're a fool, urban softy, or yuppie who can't fathom paying $0.50 for something when you could pay $16 for it, here's are DC's best restaurants for mac and cheese. (photo)

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It's bizarre. Washington, D.C., is not on the coast, doesn't have an abundance of top-tier seafood restaurants, and the Asians have been shunted to the suburbs. But a lot of DC restaurants serve excellent tuna tartare, the most delicious pink, moist, fishy-smelling appetizer that doesn't leave you picking hair out of your teeth afterwards. (photo)

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Back in college I thought I was allergic to wine; a few glasses and I'd have a two-day hangover. But then I graduated, got a job, and was able to afford wine out of a bottle. Good bye Franzia, hello muse! But as much as I enjoy wine now, I hate the pretense that goes with it at some stores and restaurants. It's been a while since I gnawed on bark, so saying a wine has a "slightly oaky tint" doesn't tell me whether or not I'll like it. And the prices can be even more off putting. When I'm in your store at noon on a Tuesday reeking of last night, wearing a t-shirt that says "Dykes against Bush," with a cigarette butt in my hair, do I look like I'm in the market for a $30 "special occasion" wine? Here are some DC area wine stores that offer good selections at reasonable prices with minimal affectation. (photo)

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Whether you are a bi-curious woman who's part of a couple, a hardcore swinger without time for idle chitchat, a bear into the leather scene, someone who thinks fat-bottomed girls make the rockin' world go 'round, a confused man willing to put part of yourself into a hole in a wall and hope for the best, an elderly homosexual into autoeroticism, or a dedicated practitioner of doggystyle, Washington, DC, has a club for you. Although these sex and swingers clubs cater to a wide range of interests, most them have another thing in common: they bill themselves as "classy." (For the record, and to protect my wife's integrity, all research for this piece was conducted online or through interviews. And what's below the jump is NSFW, unless of course you work for Gridskipper.) (photo)

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Want a big fruity drink with a little umbrella in it while in Honolulu? No problem (just don't show any pictures of yourself imbibing them to your friends; what gets consumed in Hawaii stays in Hawaii). Beer's not much of a problem, either : most bars in Honolulu offer a good selection, including excellent local brews from the Kona Brewing Company. But what about wine? Hawaii's climate isn't suitable for winemaking, but it's ripe for wine drinking. That being the case, it's surprisingly difficult to find restaurants with quality wine lists and wine stores with knowledgeable staff and an excellent selection. Some picks after the jump. (photo)

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After a brief sabbatical, the feud between preppy, invite-only social network Late Night Shots and Wonkette, Washington City Paper, and other ironic hipster media outlets has begun anew. With LNS having just been deemed reality-TV worthy (maybe) and the LNS founder entertaining a Wonkette photographer with his uproarious Sean Penn imitation, DC is witnessing a renaissance of the summer of 2007. (Can a Larry Craig relapse be far behind?) Gridskipper already covered how to avoid douchebags in Georgetown. But what if you want to find them? You know, if only to document their doings.

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Staying long-term in a hotel isn't just for writers working on their masterpieces, overweight college basketball coaches (looking at you, Rick Majerus), or Lindsay Lohan circa 2006 anymore. Whether it's because you're in another city for a long-term work assignment or you've bottomed out in Lisbon and discovered a hotel room can be cheaper than a hostel bed, you might find yourself a hotel guest for more than a month, as I did recently. But the odds are you won't be staying at hep places geared to accommodating extended residencies like the Hotel Chelsea or LA's Chateau Marmont Hotel. Lodging at a hotel short-term requires no discretion: toss your empties on the floor, puke in the sink, smear santorum on the sheets. Who cares? By the time housekeeping checks the room you'll be in Cleveland. But a long-term stint in a place meant for short-term living does require a little strategy. (photo)

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In January, my wife came home with Brady Bunch-like news: She was going to Hawaii for work and, while her employer wasn't as generous as Mike Brady's boss Mr. Phillips, who paid for the whole clan and Alice to go to Honolulu to watch Mike's building be constructed, I'd at least have free accommodations. I figured the 45 days we'd be there would give me ample time to relive the Brady Bunch's 1972 groundbreaking trip. But Don Ho and Vincent Price are dead, the Hawaii episodes still give me night terrors, and no one on Oahu cares that it was the setting for television's most important three-part episode (narrowly besting the Welcome Back, Kotter where Julie delivers twins). But after a few mai tais to quell my terrors, I set to work researching this guide to the Hawaiian Brady Bunch experience.

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If you're coming to Honolulu for the Pro Bowl this weekend, well, you're probably not an NFL all-star; many players who made the squad are skipping the game. But you probably are staying in Waikiki, as the Hawaiians do an excellent job of sequestering the tourists to that small part of Oahu. Waikiki is one long chain restaurant that starts with a Hard Rock Cafe, ends with a Cheesecake Factory, and has a Planet Hollywood nestled in between. But why suffer at those Pacific outposts of American soullessness when there are local gems worth checking out? And by local gems, I mean dive bars that no tourist staying at the Hilton Hawaiian Village would be caught dead in. If you are residing at the Hilton Hawaiian Village, maybe a trip to one of these spots will redeem your poor, depraved psyche. If only redemption were so easy for my New England Patriots.

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Despite Barack Obama's rout in South Carolina last weekend, cranky John McCain's renaissance, and Mitt Romney's willingness to sell his soul for a vote (do Mormons even have souls?), polls and the futures market predict that come January 2009, Bill Clinton is returning to the White House. And while I don't support Hillary, I will welcome back Bill wholeheartedly -- DC hasn't been much fun since the Bush twins matured. Imagine the possibilities: Bill tripping down the stairs of the White House while on another bender with Greg Norman, Hillary meeting with Nicholas Sarkozy while Bill entertains Sarkozy's hot wife with tea and a nooner, et cetera. When the time comes, here are some places you might spot America's first black First Lady upon his triumphant return to DC.

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My architectural education is limited to having played with Legos, read Ayn Rand's The Fountainhead, and watched every episode of The Brady Bunch. But I know ugly. And amongst Washington DC's, numerous monuments are several that would make Rand's Howard Roark reach for his dynamite -- or at least make Mike Brady want to give someone a stern talking-to. Please don't confuse criticism of a memorial with criticism of the memorialized. You've seen the bumper stickers leftists put on their car saying, "Honor the warrior, not the war"? Think of this post as "Honor the warrior, but not with an ugly-ass memorial."

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It's the beginning of 2008, and our friends at Lifehacker have been discussing how to achieve their New Year's resolutions: identify the right goals, be realistic, track your progress. But I have another suggestion: hire a day laborer to achieve them for you. Look at my resolutions. I wanted to learn Spanish; I hired a day laborer to speak it for me. I wanted to put less effort into my Gridskipper posts; I hired a day laborer to write them for me. I wanted to lay off the crack; I hired a day laborer to smoke me out. If you're in the DC area and are interested in outsourcing your life, here are some places to find affordable help.

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In the seven years that I've lived in the DC area, I've only missed watching a few New England Patriots games on TV. Saturday, however -- when the Pats attempt to finish the NFL's regular season undefeated -- I won't be watching. I've had longstanding plans to go to Miami. No biggie, there are TVs there. Only ... a friend is going to be in Miami then too, we'd discussed dining together, and Saturday is the only night that worked for him. OK, restaurants have TVs.

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During Christmastime, thoughts turn to days of yore like gifts from Santa, grandma's cooking, and the convenience store being your sole source for smut. But St. Nick's a fraud, grandma's been dead since '97, and the Internet has made porn ubiquitous. The holiday season, however, provides a good reason to buy skin mags-- if you're visiting your family, how else are you going to get your porn fix? Do you dare risk a peek at Mr. Chews Asian Beaver on your dad's computer? Christmas is the perfect time to relive your misspent youth. Head out to the convenience store and pack a slim brown paper bag with Cheri, Juggs, or Barely Legal Babes. Rip open the plastic wrappers on the drive home, stash the magazines in your shirt as you book it past your mom, and then finally, finally, enjoy your time alone. Here are some of the best places in DC to partake in that salacious stroll down memory lane. If we missed your favorite source for shots of clean-shaven cooch, please share your suggestions in the comments or tipline, pervs. (photo)

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It may be hard to be a Jew on Christmas, but it's easy to be a Jew in DC. The nation's capital has a slew of Jewish-related sites (and I'm not going to make the obvious joke about the Bureau of Engraving and Printing). Why else would such fun-loving Jews as Henry Kissinger, Joe Lieberman, and Paul Wolfowitz be drawn to DC? Share your kosher suggestions in the comments or tipline. Toda raba!

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Too often, restaurant reviews focus on the trifling aspects of a meal, such as presentation and ambiance, and omit the vital facts, like whether the food will cause you to shit yourself. Knowing if the restaurant has received a health code violation may give you some insight into whether eating there will make you ill, but restaurants that pass inspection still can serve up a bad meal. All of the venues listed herein have made me sick -- not to be confused with establishments where I have made myself sick (there's a big difference). Soiled yourself because of bad food at a DC restaurant recently? Share your pain (though not your emissions) in the comments or tips.

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In addition to a cultural revival, Washington DC also seems to be experiencing a crack renaissance. Local bloggers have been reporting scores of rock-related incidents, the DC-based Families Against Mandatory Minimums got the minimum penalties for some crack offenses reduced, and The Washington Post's Pulitzer Prize winning classical music critic Tim Page had to apologize to former Mayor Marion Barry after referring to him as a "crack addict" in a private e-mail -- an accusation supported by, um, facts. While Southeast and Northeast DC have a reputation for drugs and crime, there are plenty of places where you can find a little white ball in Chocolate City's Northwest quadrant.

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Late one night some friends craved food, so they stopped to eat at a restaurant and bar that we frequent. They were enjoying their burger and wings when they were joined by a mouse and a couple of cockroaches. The critters had an air that said they were regulars, a pretension the waitstaff didn't dispute. Now if I were the one eating there, I would've finished my meal, made a mental note just to drink beer on future visits, and been done with the matter. But my friends are lawyers, so they went home and researched what the local bureaucracy had to say about the restaurant. Turns out it had four critical violations on its last inspection alone. So that got me wondering -- what other restaurants have health code violations? Thankfully The Washington Post runs a weekly list of restaurants that received health code violations. Read on to discover what restaurants are having sewage problems, unable to minimize their vermin problems, and misusing toxic materials.

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